The Job Interview

We wanted to help Mother with her decision on which Easter Egger boy gets to stay so we decided to host a round of interviews. We asked for Mother’s assistance, naturally, and decided that I, Madeline, would be the judge. I think everyone choose me since I’m the most timid, especially around the boys, and so if I was comfortable, everyone should be comfortable. We also wanted to get to the bottom of who exactly was causing the aggression problems.

Here is what we found.

ROUND ONE

Mother locked all the Big Boys in the coop and put all us girls (and Hansel) out in the yard. Each boy was brought out one at a time and Mother recorded their behavior over a 30 minute period- we wanted to be very scientific and have lots to report to you fine people. We were looking for a decent amount of calm, but we can’t ignore our duties, so there needs to be some Romance as well.

No Name: He was quite calm once the other Big Boys were out of the way. He even called us over to the bread that Mother threw out for us. He did make romantic gestures to one of the EE girls, but he was gentle about it and didn’t pull her feathers (much). He seemed interested in one of the Brahma girls, but she ran him off. He and Hansel had a show-down, but it was rather sad as neither of them was aggressive. We were all quite relaxed. He’s a little scared of Mother and doesn’t like to be caught.

Jane: He came out and was quite a show-off, puffing up his chest and dancing around, but it seemed to be mostly for himself. He basically ignored us girls, making a few advances but losing interest. We ignored him right back. The worst part was when Mother tried to catch him to put him back in the coop. He is terrified of Mother (we don’t know why) and made it very hard for her to catch him.

Gulliver, the Orpington: Gulliver has always been the most gentlemanly of the Big Boys. He is interested in romance, but he is gentle and easily pleased. As soon as Mother let him out, he came over to check on us girls but didn’t bother us. We were all a little more alert than with the first 2 boys, but not bothered enough to stop sunbathing.

Amelia: Out of the 3 EE boys, he is the only one who isn’t afraid of Mother and doesn’t put up a fuss when she needs to catch him. He is the one that Mother was the most concerned about because it always seems that he’s in the middle of the rough treatment of the EE hens. He did come out and immediately try to romance a couple of us- Pippi, one of the Brahmas, and one of the EEs- but we were all surprised by the general calm. Not as calm as with Gulliver or the first EE, but no one was jumped either.

Ernest, the Brahma: Mother has been a bit upset lately because he has been acting ugly. He’s the biggest of the Big Boys now and he’s decided that he doesn’t particularly like Mother (at least not her hands). It makes her sad because he was always rather friendly with her before- she sent the other Brahma boy off to Freezer Camp because she though Ernest was so wonderful- but now he’s a bit of a problem. He was the most interested, and successful, at romance, but he’s not particularly gentle. Once he had his way with a couple of the girls, though, he mostly settled down and just hung out.

Round Two

After all the Big Boys had had an opportunity to show off their behavior, we wanted to see if a certain combination of boys created a problem. So Mother started introducing the boys slowly and watching for problems.

Ernest + Gulliver: Ernest was still pursuing the ladies, but not aggressively. He ran at Gulliver when he first came in, but then he gave up and wandered off. Gulliver was calm and having a snack on some grass.

Ernest + Gulliver + No Name: No real change. No Name tried to romance on of the Brahma girls, but again was denied. The other Big Boys came over to see what the hubbub was about but didn’t interfere.

Ernest + Gulliver + No Name + Jane: Jane tried to initiate some romance, but failed each time. He always gets a little over excited and bites the girls necks, but never accomplishes anything with it. Mother says that is even worse than being rough but getting the job done.

Ernest + Gulliver + No Name + Jane + Amelia: Surprisingly, the Big Boys were all being on their best behavior by the end of this process. Amelia again romanced one of the EE girls, but there wasn’t a melee of flailing roosters this time. We think they had figured out they were being tested…

Some Conclusions

The poll results:

Amelia 51%

No Name 37%

Jane 12 %

So, between the helpful poll results, the lack of romancing skills, and the complete fear of Mother, Jane just won’t make the cut. Mother is disappointed because she really does think Jane is handsome and wouldn’t mind seeing some of those genes get passed on, but, for the good of the flock, Jane must go.

Ernest is on probation. Mother doesn’t want to lose her only Brahma boy but he’s got to get his act together or she’s shipping him off to Freezer Camp. If he were gentler with us or not such a jerk to Mother right now, it would be fine, but both is annoying.

Amelia and No Name (who seriously needs a name) are really neck and neck in the race for the job as Easter Egger rooster. No name is a little better behaved with us girls but Amelia is better with Mother. Mother also thinks that Amelia is the more handsome of the two, but No Name is a bit larger. She’s determined to make the decision sometime next week, so she’s going to think about it a lot.

Funniest event of the day: Hansel thought that he would try to romance one of the Big Girls since all the Big Boys were doing it. He hopped on Cordelia’s back and tried to whisper sweet nothings in her ear, but he is so small she just kept walking around with him on her back, his attempts at romance complete ignored. Mother really, really wishes she had a camera at that moment!

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